On: Feelings Without Guilt

by Kira @ Her New Leaf on March 23, 2012

I hope you’ll all bear with me while I get a little self-reflective for a minute. I know that I always appreciate when bloggers “keep it real,” so hopefully you will too.

I’ve been struggling with some feelings lately – do you know that sensation? You’re going along, living your life, then BAM: feelings. Sometimes it seems like they come out of nowhere! But here’s my struggle: sometimes I feel guilty about my feelings.

When I feel frustrated with my job, I feel guilty, because there are millions of people in this country who are unemployed.

When I feel disappointed about my responses (as of yet) to my graduate school applications, I feel guilty, because higher education is a privilege that many don’t get to enjoy.

When I feel sad that it’s been cold and gray here for two weeks now, I feel guilty, because I live in freaking Los Angeles where people all over the world dream of visiting.

But I decided something, and I invite you to all to do the same: Let’s stop feeling guilty about our feelings!

It’s okay to want the best for yourself. To desire your dream job or dream school. Or to wish for sunshine every day! Let’s put our feelings out there, without guilt, so they can be felt and so we can move on. Does that sound like a deal we can make?

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Meg March 23, 2012 at 11:30 am

Amen sister! Love this! I struggled with guilt my whole life, right up until my second pregnancy (for whatever reason). And while those guilty feeling have a sneaky way of weaseling their way back in from time to time, I feel freed on some many levels.

It is MORE than okay to want to be happy. That is all that matters.

Meg ;)


Frankie March 23, 2012 at 11:41 am

Deal. Also that whole bam feelings thing, is the worst, and happening to me too right now. I think it’s because I’m overtired. Maybe I won’t be so sensitive once I’ve taken a nap. :)


epstemar March 23, 2012 at 12:49 pm

It’s 73 and sunny in Boston, and I’m feeling great! I think I’ll feel even better next Wednesday though!!!


Our Wired Lives March 23, 2012 at 2:22 pm

guilt definitely doesn’t really work well for me. I find that I feel guilty about not doing stuff. Supposedly, that should motivate me to do stuff right? Nope, it only makes me feel even worse and thus I procrastinate and get even lazier. Unproductive this guilt stuff. Feel your feelings and be okay with that. I definitely think we’re all allowed to.


Christine March 23, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Got that right K! I was raised a Catholic so guilt is natural for me. It just happens. Sometimes we get over it and sometimes it lingers. We’re human. We can’t help but feel the way we feel. The only difference is that if we let the guilt eat at us too long it can turn to depression – we don’t want that.


Hemborgwife March 25, 2012 at 10:28 am

Raised Catholic too and it is the worst guilt!


Hannah March 25, 2012 at 6:56 pm

I think we should be aware that we are fortunate to be in the situations we are. While I do not think guilt is the answer, being humble and thankful is important. I make a lot of sacrifices for the lifestyle I lead and while I do not feel guilty for having food on my table or taking time for a nice vacation, I am humble to realize that hard work and determination are not the only factors of my success and I am thankful for the doors that have been opened for me and my friends and family’s encouragement.


Kira @ Her New Leaf March 25, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Definitely agree about humility and thankfulness are important, but I’m learning to let the bad things go and not dwell on the negative. It’s just something that’s been on my mind lately, so I thought I’d share and hopefully help someone else who is struggling with similar feelings. : )


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